Short Sighted

Today I am short sighted. This I know. I have no great spiritual insight or wisdom to share. Instead I have a heart full of emotions, a weary spirit, and a mind full of frustration. Oh, the weight of these feet of clay.

I just finished reading a book by Tosca Lee entitled Havah: The Story of Eve. More than any other book I've read in years, this one impacted me and stirred my soul. On a daily basis we experience the struggle of flesh with spirit and we feel the mighty burden of sin, even though as disciples of Christ we do know hope and redemption. This book, though fiction, offered such a striking and real picture of the harmony and love and beauty in the Garden versus the desperation and loneliness and strife in a world without God. It broke my heart because of our sad state and stirred within me a longing cry for my Savior and restoration.

Maybe because of all I felt in reading that book, I am feeling more deeply my struggles today because in them I see myself living out the consequences of mankind turning from God. Are my struggles so big? Certainly not. They are the stuff of daily life and yet today they overwhelm me because for a moment I've caught a glimmer of a life in eternity. But staying focused on my eternal purpose is a constant battle.

My dirty house beckons...
A sick and angry child screams and whines and pleads...
Another child sweetly demands my every attention...
My errands and agenda are twarted by the aforementioned...
Plans crop up for my husband that leave me facing alone the previous stated issues...
Missing my family so far way causes sharp pangs of loneliness in my heart...
Indecision and lack of direction over other issues plague me..
And I'm sick.

Short sighted.
With my head bent in weariness, all I see are my feet of clay.
Uninspiring. Unmotivating.

Despite it all, I feel the hand of my Shephard gently lifitng my chin and calling my name.

"Look up, child. I love you. I chose you. You are mine. Follow me."

And with that, I can begin again. With my sight set on Him, I need not see what lies ahead. In fact, I need not see anything else...what lies ahead, what fell behind, what surrounds. I need only know that He is here with me. I am not alone. And I am loved.